Anti-goals: defining what you don’t want from freelancing

You’ve heard of goals – the guard rails you give yourself to make sure you stay on the right tracks.

Well, let me introduce you to another concept – anti-goals.

If goals are the north star of what you want from business, career, creativity, life, relationships, study, health, and more, anti-goals are the equally important southern end of the compass.

Anti-goals help you:

·       Define what you don’t want in life, work, and creativity

·       Figure out the person you don’t want to be and leverage it wisely

·       Remind you of the people, places, and experiences that aren’t right for you

·       Make intentional choices, even when you haven’t figured out the goal yet

·       Figure out which decision is the right one, even if the outcome isn’t clear

·       Articulate the kind of behaviours you don’t want to engage with, practice, or invite

·       Plot out the steppingstones that lead you to burn out, stress, and mental health impacts that you want to avoid  

·       Promote empowerment through saying no, having boundaries, and giving you permission (and templates) to pushback

·       Protect your business and your financial security through boundaries

Here’s an example of how I have used anti-goals in the past for my freelance business.   

How do you define your own anti goals?

Anti-goals allow you to define what doesn’t appeal, serve you, or feel like it is right for you now or in the future.

To guide your anti-goals, you can look at:

·       What makes you annoyed, angry, or stressed

·       Things you’ve done and didn’t like in your creative or working past

·       What you don’t like about other people in business

·       Habits you don’t want

·       Attitudes and ideals you don’t respect

·       Traps you get caught in

·       Problems you don’t want to encourage

And so on it goes until you’ve defined what an undesirable version of a working life, your own business, or your creative legacy might be.

Like goals, choosing your anti-goals is a personal process. But you can benefit from using scales like SMART (Specific, Measurable, Actionable, Realistic, Timely) to make sure you’re not too rigid or setting yourself up for self-punishment.

Try anti-goals on for size

You can also use these anti-goals questions to help what you don’t want for your freelance business.

1)       Who don’t you want to be as a professional, creative, or colleague?

2)       What kinds of work do you want to avoid doing?

3)       What kinds of clients feel wrong for you?

4)       What don’t you want others to associate with you?

5)       What don’t you want others to say about you or your work?

6)       Who doesn’t bring out the best in you?

7)       What situations do you want to avoid?

8)       What level of financial support from others makes freelancing untenable for you?

9)       What marketing techniques leave you cold?

10)  What aspects of client management stress you out?

11)  Who don’t you want to work with?

12)  Who don’t you want to support with your social media praise and recognition?

13)  What ideas do you find boring and repetitive?

14)  If someone reviewed your body of work, what wouldn’t you want them to say, see, feel, think, or do?

15)   If you lost your freelance business tomorrow, what would you miss the most?

16)  What does a hellish freelance day look like to you?

17)  What boundaries do you refuse to cross?

18)  What have you experienced in freelancing previously that you refuse to experience again?

 

And reverse the anti-goals process

1)       Why do you enjoy freelancing?

2)       What is the best version of professional, creative, or colleague you?

3)       What kind of projects light up your mind, soul, and brain?

4)       Who is your ideal client?

5)       What do you want others to associate with you?

6)       What do you want others to say about you or your work?

7)       Who brings out the best in you?

8)       What is your version of earning well while still enjoying a good worklife balance?

9)       What marketing techniques make you curious?

10)  What marketing tactics work for you?

11)  What aspects of client management do you enjoy?

12)  What kinds of clients make freelancing worthwhile?

13)  Who would you like to support with your social media praise and recognition?

14)  What ideas energise you?

15)  If someone reviewed your body of work, what would you like them to see, feel, think, or do?

16)   How can you do more of what you’d miss if you no longer freelanced?

17)  What does a positive freelance day look like to you?

18)  What is more a case-by-case situation than a fixed boundary?

19)  What sort of challenge is the right kind of challenge for you?

 Taking your anti-goals further 

Once you’ve answered your anti-goals and mapped out what a good working life looks like for you, think about:

Sometimes, are anti-goals are situational. Consider:

a)       What are the industries and fields you need to avoid?

b)       What kinds of working personalities aren’t your cup of tea?

c)       What kinds of work put you in conflict with your values?

d)       In your personal life, who do you need to avoid discussing work with?

e)       What actions do you need to take to avoid sacrificing your boundaries, ideals, or principles? (e.g., always having two mortgage payments in the bank account so you can knock back clients who don’t feel quite right or not working with large organisations to avoid death by committee)   

What can you do to encourage your better freelancing outcomes:

a)       Emotionally

b)       Intellectually

c)       Physically

d)       Spiritually

e)       Psychologically

f)         Financially  

 

To avoid your anti-goals, how will you protect your:  

a)       Connection to the work

b)       Vision and version of freelancing

c)       Portfolio and working identity

d)       Financial situation  

e)       Mental health and self-care

 

Think about the clients, peers, and mentors you spend your time with: 

a)       Are you safe when you leave the room from ridicule, gossip, and harm?

b)       Do you feel safe, supported, and welcome?

c)       Is the praise healthy, well distributed, useful, realistic, and connecting? (as opposed to unhealthy, manipulative, having a singular focus on one or two individuals, not accompanied by feedback or critical thinking, overblown, and insular)  

d)       Is time spent in their company positive and affirming?

e)       Do the values they share publicly match their private action?

f)         Are you continuously asked for praise and support, or are you given it in equal measure?

g)       Beyond the usual social awkwardness, can you relax in their presence?

 Anti-goals for your life 

When we die, the gig is up. There are no do-overs.

Keeping that in mind, what might your end-of-life anti goals look like?

·       Who don’t you want at your funeral?

·       What don’t you want written in your obituary?

·       What wouldn’t you want written on your tombstone?

·       What don’t you want buried (or scattered) with you?

·       Who do you want at your funeral?

·       What would you like those who care about you to say?

·       What do you want written on your tombstone to sum up a well-lived life?

·       What would you like to take with you when you die?

·       What do you want the kids and young people in your life to say about the freelancing version of you?

·       What will be your creative legacy?

Need help shifting towards more of what you want from your freelancing journey? Join me for Office Hours for an espresso shot of confidence every fourth Wednesday of the month to gain clarity.

Want more advice like the anti-goals work you’ve done here? Check out more in the self-care section now! Or join me for an hour of coaching.