Office cats around Australia have called a stop work meeting to protest recent requests by freelancers and their clients related to their Zoom antics. Last Friday, the Association for Freelance Cats received an open letter requesting a series of changes to office cat behaviour.
These changes include not chasing the mouse on desk or on screen, abstaining from attacking feet under the desk, and not smudging their tuna face on their freelance human after lunch breaks.
Negotiations of the new workplace agreement were proceeding well, but a late inclusion seems to have whiskers and tails twitching.
“We absolutely refuse to give up our right to walk past and share our buttholes during Zoom meetings,” explained the Association for Freelance Cats president, Mittens Purrito.
“The thought of wearing trousers puts anger in our meowsers,” agreed Working From Home specialist, Inky Blakskatz Floofarella Esq.
Initially dismissing the cat’s concerns, cat-owning freelancers around the country have awoken to a familiar yet eerie sight. Cats are holding a mass protest, sitting on laptops, keyboards, tablets, phones, and any device they can to disrupt the working day.
“We’ve never seen anything like this,” said the original instigator of the request, Cecil Workerbeedamill.
“That fluffy little jerk is not only sitting on my laptop. He swipes every time I get near it!”
The cats are promising to remove their floofy selves and resume negotiations “once the humans remove the butthole clauses and apologise for their silly chimpery.”
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